pictures or whatever.

Be back later...

Summercamp, be back on the 4th.

Current Music : Cowboy Bebop - Black Coffee

Biking

For those of you who dont know, biking is a form of meditation for me..

I mean, think about it.. you're riding around twilight, its cool out, but you're still quite warm from the last half mile sprint...

Anything can be meditation, even life itself.. just existing is relaxing under meditative circumstances...

Even in biking it gets tiring when total morons are on the sidewalk, a vietnamese lady walking her dog without a leash, Stupid americans who walk three broad in an effort to burn their fat, Countless mexicans with families of 10 who cross hap-hazardly..

And pretty much all of them try to get out of the way, its ironic really.. The lady with the dog ends up chasing him in my way, the fat americans merge outwards like cattle, when they should simply merge right and let me take my chances with oncoming traffic, The families and their countless offspring.. who either part down the middle like a pack of scared roaches or try to go backwards.. which ends up getting in my way too...

Countless multitudes of mind-desolated brainless cantankerous disgustingly underintelligent dweebs, jerks, morons, buttheads, baffoons, stupid idiots, pedejos, stupinagoles, degernates, vagrants, vagabons, imigrants, schiese's, shizblasters, jizzwits, wingnuts, crackheads, turdburglars, weasls, wetbunnies and fools get in my way EVERY DAY.

Today in fact, these nice white people where taking their freshly-borne future-marines out for a stroll in the park.. How could I tell this was the kid's future? He was white, with buzzed hair trailertrash, holding an mini-replica M-16 and wearing a shirt that sad something about bin-laden...

So then, I come flying nicely down the path.. and this kid is walking aimlessly shooting at trees with imaginary bullets.. then out of the blue his dad grabs him and pulls him out of the road assuming that I'm hellbent on running this kid over.. although it crossed my mind, I did slow down and they got him out of the way.

But out of the corner of my eye I see this satisfied look on the father's face, Whats this? He's happy about pulling his kid off of the road so quickly..

But little does this middle-aged hairless witless gutless overgrown inbred overfed piece of american white excrement know that theres some little mexican kids up the way.. I might as well get off of my bike and walk home, at this rate the stop and go is slowing me down more than just walking...

Bafoons.

Other than that, I meditated this whole post up when I was on the service road, which was right before the wing-nuts, but right after the jizzwits...

Current Music : The Seatbelts - Farewell Blues [alternate take]

Autobiography

Happiness, is just a word to me and it might have meant a thing or two if I'd known the difference.

Emptiness, a lonely parody and my life another smokin' gun, a sign of my indifference.

Always keepin' safe inside where no one ever had a chance to penetrate a break in.

Let me tell you some have tried, but I would slam the door so tight that they could never get in.

Kept my cool under a lock and key and I never shed a tear; another sign of my condition.

Fear of love or bitter vanity, that kept me on the run; the main events of my confession

I kept a chain upon my door that would shake the shame of Cain into a blind submission.

The burning ghost without a name was still calling all the same, but I just wouldn't listen.

The longer I'd stall, the further I'd crawl
The further I'd crawl, the harder I'd fall
I was crawlin' into the fire.

The more that I saw, the further I'd fall
The further I'd fall, the lower I'd crawl
I kept fallin' into the fire-- into the fire...
Into the fire!

Suddenly, it occurred to me the reason for the run and hide had totaled my existence.

Everything left on the other side could never be much worse than this, but could I go the distance?

I faced the door and all my shame, tearin' off each piece of chain until they all were broken.

But no matter how I tried, the other side was locked so tight that door it wouldn't open.

Gave it all that I got and started to knock.
Shouted for someone to open the lock,
I just gotta get through the door.

And the more that I knocked, the hotter I got,
The hotter I got, the harder I'd knock,
I just gotta break through the door

Gotta knock a little harder, Gotta knock a little harder!
Gotta knock a little harder, Break through the door!!

Gotta knock a little harder....... break down-- the door..

Current Music : The Seatbelts - Gotta knock a little harder

Summer-camp.

This week I'm gonna be at summer camp.. I think its from the 1st 'til the 4th... which adds to the irony of me quitting videogames for a month, because I was supposed to go from the 1st to the 1st, but since I'm leaving that day and I started a little early I'll be going from the 27th til the 4th...

I dont really miss the games all that much.. I just miss killing stupid people and laughing about their errors in combat...

So, this last week my mommy got me a buncha new clothes, and I feel all bling-bling for summercamp.. w00t to the bizzle.

and then.. today I went to the church's picnic, it was pretty good.. I watched some guys play softball.. and sat around... it was good.

Dahhhhh.........................thats all folks

Current Music : Sublime - Get out![remix]

All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was the one in charge...

"I should be in charge" said the brain, "because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen".
"I should be in charge" said the blood, "because I circulate oxygen all over, so without me you'd all waste away."
"I should be in charge" said the stomach, "because I process food and give all of you energy."
"I should be in charge" said the legs, "because I carry the body wherever it needs to go."
"I should be in charge" said the eyes, "because I allow the body to see where it goes."
"I should be in charge" said the rectum, "because I'm responsible for waste removal."

All the other body parts laughed at the rectum and insulted him, so in a huff, he shut down tight.

Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache, the stomach was bloated, the legs got wobbly, the eyes got watery and the blood was toxic. They all decided! That the rectum should be the boss.

The Moral of the story?

The ass hole is usually in charge.


Current Music : Prodigy - Breathe

24 hour crew

Well, Its been a day..

Yesterday morning I got up at 5am to go to lake perris in riverside, where we rode around on my late grandpa's boat... good times.

And then, we came home around 5pm, and once I got home I realized I had enough time to make it to church, which was cool.

Then after church I came home, and sat around for awhile... doo doo dooo... 11:59pm rolls around and here comes jody! ready for action!

We went to K-uci and I got to watch her DJ some anime/jpop/eclectic stuff, which was pretty cool.. then we came home and I drank enough coffee to make a horse go blind... so I finally gave out from exhaustion around 5am...

Then today [woo hoo], I wake up at 11am and clean myself up; I really sweated alot in my sleep. haha

I biked to josh's house today, we talked for awhile and then walked up to starbucks, sarah came with us.. it was pretty fun...

When we got back me and josh started sparing, that was fun too.

I am tired out of my mind.

Bai

Current Music : The Seatbelts - Wandering Cowboy ED

This little thing called gov...gov...government...

Well.. heres it is..


My veiw on government is that too many people let laws control their lives, wether by obeying the goverment and not setting your own standards, or by disobeying the government and throwing your own standards away in an attempt to create a 'new' way of life...

When in reality, both ways are guilty of the same problem; neglecting their own free-will.

Free-will is the only thing that seperates man from beast, the only thing that seperates man from machine.

It is what makes people so powerful, to determine a goal, and then achieve it.

But when we let our lives go into 'auto-pilot' by obeying everything that the government or anyone else says, then we forget to use our own free-will, and eventually we lose our own standards because we're letting the government play the role of God himself in telling us right from wrong.

It is a pathetic sight to see government from a cynics standpoint, because it just appears to be 'human-herding' with good revinue to boot!

But in reality the government is guilty of nothing, except accepting what the people have given up freely; their free-will.

Because we all know that humans would rather have someone else do it, someone else to help them carry the load, take the blame and eventually wipe their ass and think for them.

So then, the government isnt evil, its only what it is, a means to keep the world going around. Leadership isnt a bad thing at all, its when people let the leader decide for them thats bad, its apathy thats bad.

The only relevant argument against anarchy is that chaos would reign, and eventually form back into government again.

The cause of this is simple; people would rather have someone else do it, and in the case of anarchy, it would be someone else to watch my back, someone else to guard my city, someone else to keep me safe.

My only quip with governemnt is that people are so freely given to let go of self-rulership and give over authority to government.

Heres a conversation I had with ryan...

--preface: Ryan had a bonfire, and I smoked right in from of the chaperones..

Ryan: Well, I'll be honest with you, I was surprised that you would do it in front of Cindy and Tony like that.
Sean: I bummed off of tony, are you kidding me?
Sean: Him, cindy and barbara where drinking alcohol right there too.
Ryan: You're right
Sean: Anyways, I quit.
Ryan: You quit smoking?
Sean: Yes, I did.
Sean: But its still quite funny... The same people there to protect us from the evil alcohol and tobacco are right there, drinking and smoking.
Ryan: Yeah, i'll admit that's pretty funny, Just leave it to the American people to have a double-standard.
Sean: We've got double standards for everything
Sean: We've even got double standards on our double standards.
Ryan: Would that make it a triple-standard?
Sean: I have no clue.
Sean: some kind of standard.
Sean: A bad one at that.
Ryan: Yeah
Ryan: We undermine our own laws at the expense of the American Dream, if there still is a dream.
Sean: The american dream is this; A middle aged working class schmuck, making 45,00$ per year, because if he makes anymore he'll get about a 20% more tax, which will drop him below what he'd be making if he'd just have made less to begin with. Who has had the government wipe his ass and play God for him all of his life. Because he doesnt even care about his standards.
Sean: "What?" he'd reply.
Sean: "We're supposed to have standards??"
Ryan: I see what you mean, and it is pretty darn true..
Sean: "Why bother? The government tells us whats right and wrong, and as long as they're collecting revinue off of the buisness of people herding I dont mind giving my 60% to them"
Sean: Its quite pathetic really.
Ryan: Yes. I wonder how it still works.
Sean: People are so apathetic, thats how.
Sean: People would rather have someone else do it.
Sean: Even if that means they put their life on autopilot and just kick back and let everyone make their decisions..
Ryan: Plus, America is full of desperate people, they dont care if they're being screwed over, as long as their here and getting paid.
Sean: Well.. thats only say, 25% of the population
Ryan: Even so
Ryan: One of the most important portions of the population nonetheless
Sean: Enter, the mid-life crisis, where our schmuck says to himself "Whoa, when did that happen? when did I get old? when did I say this was right?"
Sean: the rest are second generation, begging to die at the hands of an international corporation called "governemnt" which will lead them on the path of life for them.
Sean: "No decisions required, we have a one-size-fits-all packaged plan for your life, coming straight into your livingroom, its totally free and already in-place."
Sean: "All you have to do is ignore god and ignore your own free will."
Ryan: So true.

The moral of the story is, there is no greater way to defy convention then to make a coherent decision, even if it 'goes with the flow', it was yours to make and not many people even do that these days.

<3

Current Music : Dead to Fall - The Gates of Hell

Mixes Ahead!

Counter-strike Mix #7, "Canned Heat"
1- Rolling Stones - Paint It Black
2- Falling Cycle - I Still Dream (Part II)
3- Poison the Well - Horns And Tails
4- The Hives - Because I wanna
5- The Hives - Main Offender
6- The Hives - Die, All Right
7- Offspring - No Brakes
8- Super Troopers - Bidibodi Bidibu
9- Dick Dale - Misirlou
10- lasombra - Mechwarrior 2, Wawoow! Training Exercises
11- Standby - Final Fantasy 7, Galvanized Boss
12- Beatdrop - Final Fantasy 8, Man With Another Trance Machine
13- Standby - Final Fantasy 8, Desperados
14- Steve Blevin - Cyborg Blevo
15- EType - Free Like A Flying Demon
16- Low Fidelity All Stars - Battle Flag (Radio Mix)
17- Dialated Peoples - Turntablism
18- Red Alert - HM2
19- Rage Against The Machine - Guerilla Radio
20- Detsl - Ulichniie psi
21- Spirited Away - Samishii samishii

California Mix #2
1- Cowboy Bebop - Tank! [Live]
2- Cowboy Bebop - Rush [Live]
3- Cowboy Bebop - Mashroom hunting
4- Cowboy Bebop - Gateway
5- Cowboy Bebop - New York Rush
6- Cowboy Bebop - The EGG and I
7- Cowboy Bebop - What planet is this? [Live]
8- Cowboy Bebop - The Real Folk Blues [Live]
9- Cowboy Bebop - Yo Pumpkin Head
10- Cowboy Bebop - Don't bother none
11- Cowboy Bebop - Rush!
12- Cowboy Bebop - Too Good Too Bad
13- Cowboy Bebop - Slipper Sleaze
14- Cowboy Bebop - You make me cool
15- Cowboy Bebop - Is it real?
16- Cowboy Bebop - Waste Land
17- Cowboy Bebop - The egg and you
18- Cowboy Bebop - The Real Folk Blues (Jap)
19- Cowboy Bebop - Gotta Knock a Little Harder

Current Music : Cowboy Bebop - Waste land

In other, Less dreary news...

I'm coming back online in a week or so, which means I get to get my counter-strike clan back together! :D

And now, My week in shout-out form... [yes, this is an excuse to throw grammar out the window]

Word up to Dagger, Cait and Raven.. the (KoS) kids, I love you guys, we need to throw down some destruction soon...

Mason, Ari, Tosh and Tonka... You crazy nebraskans... glad to meet y'all ['cept mason.](Tonka and ari, I might recruit you in CS! :D)

Whats up out to DeborahSama out in louisiana..

A big wizzord out to my homegirlz, Sarah from OCC, Mary(at school!) ;( and Rochelle the girl-wonder :D..

Whats up to my O.C. Budz, LizD who's M.I.A., Sarah the Writer ;) sup chica? and big Joshrico who's in Nevada on tour...

Word to Mikey Fabien in the pimped out '91 lincoln towncar, Nice bonfire bro..

Sup' out to Ryan the Boxster bach and Jeremy "j-rome" maddux, nice bonfire bro. And to Doug, you gotta learn fire-safety! :P

Gotta shout out to all of mike's crew, Matt and Will.. sup? Richard and blake, you guys arent redheads! :D

Word up to Dane Sparticus Johnson... the man..

Best wishes to Jess(soon to be puro) Bailey and Daniel Puro on their wedding.

Gotta say Hey, to all of my {FtB} homies, glad to see you guys could pull it back together.. :)

And most of all, I gotta say Hey to my sister Jody and barbara... ;D

Thats it.

Current Music : Falling Cycle - I still dream [Part 1]

Condolences

[entry truncated]

Much love out to Sarah and her family. She lost her aunt over the weekend, who died in the delivery room. Our condolences go to her and her family <3.


Current Music : Dead to fall - Last goodbye

Fire.

It was a pleasure to burn.
It was a special pleasure to see things eaten, to see things blackened and changed.

This week I've gone to so many bonfires it aint even funny.

That is all.

Bye

Current Music : MC Chris - Robotussin

Concrete. (not me, the stuff I was working with.)

So this week my parents got bored and decided we needed an addition onto our drive-way and a patio... so they mixed up about 5 tons of cement, and poured it all into place... what a crazy family I have...

Well. It went more like this; My dad took his two weeks of vacation time to work on the house, and the first things we could think to work on where this little dirt patch next to our driveway and a big dirt area next to our patio... so what do they do? they order about 190 bags of cement and rent a cement mixer for the day.. and away we go.

And then...

=----------------------=
entry trunicated.
=----------------------=

Current Music : The Seatbelts - Newyork Rush

myland Magic Number 16 Job Writer Personality Slacker Temperament If I Lose it- Run Sexual Straight Likely To Win Some Lubricant Me - In A Word Genius Colour Brought to you by MemeJack

Optimist VS Pessimist

Well.. as you all know I consider myself a pessimist, but since reading GK chesterton's Orthodoxy, I've taken the stand of "the irrational
optimist"; one who hates the world enough to try to change it, but also loves it enough to keep it.

The entire point that chesterton makes is that you are either loyal to life or loyal to dying.. so then get busy at one and stop telling us your opinion unless it has some positive input to the optimist...

so, that being said.. Most people consider me pessimistic because when they say "This is a good thing" I reply simply with "no it isnt", because most often they dont know what they compliment, on the opposite side, when someone says "This is I bad thing" I would be more than likely to take an agressive stand against that person, because of their simple displacement of my opinion. if I agree then there should be no contest, or simple statements and observations which lead to possible insight for both parties.

But if it isnt worth it to talk, why talk?

It seems in this day and age so many people are obsessed so much with the sound of their own voice that they dont even bother to stop and listen to another's opinion.. instead they're either interrupting with unfounded statements or being generally hum-drum and over-legalistic about various terminology used, in order to trick their competition into conceeding on the idea that they dont even know what they're saying.. which usually actually works.. but is not a way to gain knowledge.

Unless both parties are willing to gain knowledge in an argument, then neither can be well edged about the subject.

And in fact neither will gain any from it, If the goal of a debate is simply to win, then it is a waste of time.

All leagalise aside, a debate should be a conversation, albeit a much more aggresive form of conversing, debating should be well-thought, well-put and slow to judge the facts... otherwise you degrade to the point when you're only waiting for your companion to state their opinion so you can attack it, and not thinking out the details.

Hmm.. that was kind of directed at josh..

Debating = good. Squabbling = bad.

NO! the tesla tank IS in fact better than the Mammoth tank... any idiot could figure that out by the sheer size to weight to price ratio of 3:1 and the firepower ratio of 2:1... duuh.

Current Music : Cowboy Bebop - Slipper sleaze

"Is it real?"

"Figurines that fall like leaves the disappear, keep calling
Is it real? Is it real?

"Dark machines that wheeze and breathe then mock the air, appalling
What is real? What is real?

"This world can really be too much
I can't take another day
I guess that I've just had enough
My minds slipping far away
I'm falling out of touch
Could someone please explain?

"Set my mind for open sky, but couldn't fly and so sadly
What am I? What am I?

"Sullen eyes shed teardrop lies then criticize, now laughing
What is real? What is real?

"It's really all become too much
I'm not sure what I should feel
I guess I've finally had enough
I don't know if this is real
I'm crashing in and out of touch
Can anyone please explain?"

Current Music : The Seatbelts - Is it real?

Is it real?

Well.. this past week has been insomnia.. and feeling like shit.. and looking like shit... other than that I'm pretty happy..

I found out today what deborah thought of me when we first started talking on aim.. hehe... anyways... Jess is getting married! ^.^

I'm still not sure if its 110% final.. but I hope so. <3



Other than that... I cant stop thinking about last year, I had really bad insomnia.. and my dreams where so realistic.. and I'd always wake up tired.. so I never knew when I was dreaming or when I was awake.. well this week has been alot like that.. with the addition of coffee I can find my way back to the land of the living ;)

Is it real?

Current Music : Cowboy Bebop - Is it Real?

Today

( This is entirely fiction. besides.. we all know that I dont smoke ;) )


Piss-stained suede shoes tell the story of a night spent in good company,
A story of bummed cigarettes, bummed mints, and bummed faces.

He swears he might've had more fun if he'd have invited someone he knew,
But acting out of character is always fun for him...

He smells like 5 or 6 different distinct things right now,
firewood, cigarettes, soot, cigarettes, sea-spray, cigarettes,

Just a big fun night eh? Probably.. fire is always fun, and so are blowtorches.

And in the words of jerry dammer, I wish I had lipstick on my shirt instead of piss-stains on my shoes.

Goodnight.

Current Music : The Specials - Pressure Drop

Bored bored bored...

Here's some crap I just feel like writting out..


Its overcast out and the sky is grey.
The sky is darker than the white house next to me.
The sky isnt a cloudy white at all.
The sky is a shade of "dirty thrift store white"..
The sky is the color of the smoke from my cigarette.
The sky is so dark right now.. that I could stare at the mid-day sun and not even squint.

The sky is the color of my mind; I stayed up too late last night.
My mind is hazy, and the world is dark.
Then suddenly, theres a light that cuts through the mist like a knife.
The light in my mind is a song, some smooth jazz; it wakes me up and sets my mind in motion.

The sky is still grey.
And the forecaster said we can expect it for the next two months.
And its still smoke grey, even if I've quit smoking.
Maybe someone else is somewhere right now, just sitting and making the sky darker.

Maybe.

Current Music : Cowboy Bebop - Bindy

The Process of Elimination

( Foreword: I've been shopping for a desk all of this week.. and I've seen more pretty ladies than you can shake a stick at... read on )

Sean: Wow, I've seen alot of really gorgeous women at furnature stores
Brain:Yeah, but you wouldnt like them so much after talking to them for about five seconds.
Sean: Hmm. yeah.. after about five minutes I can judge someones personallity..
Brain: And thats why you wouldnt like very many of them..
Sean: Yeah.. I bet that half of those conversations would end with.. "And then I met frank!", "What? you dont like the white stripes?" or "Whats so bad about marijuana? dude?"
Brain: Heh.. yeah. half-baked hippie losers that have been married before 14 and like the white stripes really freak me out
Sean: You said it.
Brain: No, Techincally YOU said it, because we're the same person and you're journalling..
Sean: You dick.

YO PUMPKIN HEAD!

Current Music : The Seatbelts - Yo Pumpkin Head!

I'm at the church... waiting for kelly... and posting.. on the really gross computers...

This bites.

Current Music : Robert Miles - Paths

Go here. K, Thanx.

Current Music : Yoko Kanno - Rain

Shopping

Blah. I hates shopping.

As some of you may know, I'm getting rid of my junky old desk, I dont know how to start describing its utter crappiness.. but lets just say that my mom spent 79$ on it... 4 years ago. sooo... naturally its pretty beaten up.

Other than that I saw a buncha pretty girlies today at various furnature stores *_*... lord have mercy.

And den... Last night me, jody and barbara sat around with mike from k-uci and watched "fight club"... Fight club is an interesting movie for alot of different reasons.. I wont spoil the plot.. so I'll just tell you to see it because its freaking great.

Shake it for the DJ... shake it, shake it.

Current Music : MC Chris - Chinese Rap

"Free lunch"

Thats what we call it when you take a bet after a meal you can barely pay for, and not only pay off the food but leave with some pocket-change.

I went to 'Islands' today, with rochelle, mike and some other people... it was good.. I ate alot of stuff that the girls couldnt finish ^_~....

what else, oh yeah. I drank this really nasty drink made of ketchup and some other crap on the table for a few bucks :D.. thats how I won the bet, because blake was too weak to stomach it.

Aside from that, I decided to dress up today, so I wore this white buttonup, and I got a little crapstain on the collar from the 'mystery-drink'.

And den.. I'll breakdown my week fo'ya..

Thursday, I was supposed to bike to church with dane, but it didnt happen.. so I just went on my lonesome..

Friday, I got really super-pissed off at my mom.. and I wrecked some stuff around my house... which landed me in alot of trouble(some of which wasnt even my fault)... so I took the rap, and then I was glad to leave my house.. so I went to play my trumpet for this elementary school graduation and I looked all fancy with my aforementioned clean white shirt(which is now stained.. I think.)-- then when I got home I helped out with preparing for the garage sale we had on saturday...

Saturday, The big garage sale.. my mom made alot of money on books.. and I got about 22$ between stuff I sold and what my mom paid me to setup... after that it was all downhill.. I sat around and drank alot of coffee from about 6am 'til 9pm....

Sunday(today), I woke up bright and early to go to church, bought some iced coffee at chruch and a doughnut.. which was a pretty good combination after that ride... then church... then islands... etc. etc.

Oh! Side-Note: I love riding fast.. but lately its seemed like alot of people arent looking where they're going.. so I need to cut back on the speed... =[ i.e., today I was going down a hill really fast and I checked the offramp that overlapped the sidewalk.. nobody was coming... so I kept going.. then I realized I was going a little too fast to make a 90 degree turn.... it all worked out once I slowed down.. but some guy was flying down the offramp and he honked at me...

What a bastard.

Thats it.

Current Music : MC Chris - Chinese Rap

(This was written by a favorite hacker of mine.)

"This was writen shortly after my arrest. I am currently
groupless, having resigned from the Racketeers, so ignore the signoff...

"The Conscience of a Hacker... by The Mentor ... 1/8/86

"Another one got caught today, It's all over the papers. "Teenager Arrested in Computer Crime Scandal", "Hacker arrested
after Bank Tampering"...

"Damn kids. They're all alike.

"But did you, in your three-piece psychology and 1950's
technobrain, ever take a look behind the eyes of a hacker? did
you ever wonder what made him tick, what forces shaped him, what
may have molded him?

"I am a hacker. Enter my world.

"Mine is a world that begins with school... I'm smarter than
most of the other kids, this crap they teach us bores me...

"Come on... Ain't Got All Day!!

"Damn underachiever. They're all alike.

"I'm in junior high or high school. I've listened to the
teachers explain for the fifteenth time how to reduce a
fraction. I understand it. "No Ms. Smith, I didn't show my work.
I did it in my head..."

"Damn kid. Probably copied it. They're all alike.

"I made a discovery today. I found a computer. Wait a second, this is cool. It does what I want it to. if it makes a mistake, it's because I screwed it up.
Not Because it doesn't like me...
Or feels threatend by me...
Or thinks I'm a smart ass...
Or doesn't like teaching and shouldn't be here...

"Damn kid. All he does is play games. They're all alike.

"And then it happened... a door opened to a world... rushing
through the phone line like junk through an addict's veins, an
electronic impulse is sent out, a refuge from the day-to-day
incompetencies is sought... a board is found.

"This is it... this is where I belong..."

"I know everyone here... even if I've never met them, never
talked to them, may never hear from them again... I know you
all...

"Damn kid. tying up the phone line again. They're all alike...

"Come on... Ain't Got All Day!!

"You bet your ass we're all alike... we've been spoon-fed baby food at school when we hungered for steak...
the bits of meat that you did let slip through were prechewed and tasteless.
We've been dominated by the sadistic, or ignored by the apathetic.
The few that had something to teach us found us willing pupils, but those few are like drops of water in the desert.

"This is our world now... the world of the electron and the switch, the beauty of the baud.
We make use of a service already existing without paying for what could be dirt-cheap if it wasn't run by profiteering gluttons, and you call us criminals.
We explore... and you call us criminals.
We seek after knowledge... and you call us criminals.
We exist without skin color, without nationality, without religous bias... and you call us criminals.
You build atomic bombs, you wage wars, you murder, cheat, and lie to us and try to make us believe it's for our own good, yet we're the criminals.

"Yes, I am a criminal. My crime is that of curiosity. My crime is that of judging people by what they say and think, not what they look like. My crime is that of outsmarting you, something
that you will never forgive me for.

"Come on... Ain't Got All Day!!

"I am a hacker, and this is my manifesto. You may stop this
individual, but you can't stop us all... after all, we're all alike." - 'the mentor', arrested the summer of 1986.


Current Music : Yoko Kanno - Dont Boter None

Engrish Stuffs


I'm pretty bored, and really wired.. so here's some intellectual stuff for all of the people...

This first link is a transcription from the book "Orthodoxy" by G.K. Chesterton, which covers alot of religious matters in very good detail. This particular chapter is an arguement about Optimism VS Pessimisim... although it may not all be in arguementative form.. its all very relevant to the arguement as a whole.

annnd secondly, this is a short page on life as a constant battle., written by Deborah Sama. Life as a battle.

I love promoting people.. and deborah has some very interesting and descriptive writings, so check out her blog @ lotuspetal.blogspot, and/or her website @ geocities.com/deborahsama

"Please come again."

Current Music : Cowboy Bebop - 7Minutes

I'm online temporarily-- until monday.

I'm tired and careless.. so I'll just post something irrelevant.

LAYER ONE:
-- Name: Sean
-- Birth day: 10/21/87
-- Birthplace: Fountain Valley, CA
-- Current Location: Santa Ana (One mile from where I was born)
-- Eye Color: dark brown
-- Hair Color: Black with brown highlights
-- Height: 6'1"
-- Righty or Lefty: Righty
-- Zodiac Sign: scorpio

LAYER TWO:
-- Your heritage: Mexican/talian
- The shoes you wore today: Suede workboots
-- Your fears: Falling endlessly, Dying without making my peace and Losing family members.
-- Your perfect pizza: Ham and sausage
-- Goal you'd like to achieve: A successful father and husband / writer(?)

LAYER THREE:
-- Your most overused phrase on AIM: "n/m"
-- Your thoughts first waking up: "Go back to sleep"
-- Your best physical feature: I dont know what other people like about me.. but I like my nose and my eyebrows.
-- Your bedtime: 3'ish ?
-- Your most missed memory: All of the times that I could've made freinds in junior high, but I never did.

LAYER FOUR:
-- Pepsi or Coke: Coke
-- McDonald's or Burger King: McDonalds.. good fries
-- Single or group dates: Dates? what are those?
-- Adidas or Nike: Doesnt matter, I dont wear either.
-- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton baybeee! put about 2 cups of that mix stuff in about 6 ounces of water O.o
-- Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate
-- Cappuccino or coffee: Coffee

LAYER FIVE:
-- Smoke: When I feel like it
-- Cuss: When I need to get a point acrossed
-- Sing: Sometimes.. but I'm really unsure of my voice
-- Take a shower everyday: Most of the time
-- Have a crush(es): I'm not sure... I have little infatuations every now and then..."*sigh* she's just so dreamy"(Until she starts being a bitch.)
-- Do you think you've been in love: Naah
-- Want to go to college: Yeah.
-- Like(d) high school: Eh.. not really.
-- Want to get married: Yeah
-- Believe in yourself: Yes
-- Get motion sickness: no
-- Think you're attractive: Yeah
-- Think you're a health freak: Nope.
-- Get along with your parent(s): Yeah.. pretty well actually.
-- Like thunderstorms: Yeah.. they're really cool.
-- Play an instrument: Yes; trumpet.

LAYER SIX:
In the past month...
-- Drank alcohol: Never..
-- Smoked: Nope
-- Done a drug: Yes
-- Had Sex:No
-- Made Out: No
-- Gone on a date: no
-- Gone to the mall: Nope
-- Eaten an entire box of Oreos:Nope
-- Eaten sushi:Naah.. My sister ordered sashimi and I asked for the teryaki beef
-- Been on stage: Yes; Last night I played trumpet for this schools' graduation ceremonies
-- Been dumped: I've never been someone's "boyfreind"
-- Gone skating: Yes; Ice skating
-- Made homemade cookies: No; But my sister made some for today's garage sale, to sell on the side.
-- Gone skinny dipping: Yup. in the shower ;)
-- Dyed your hair: Not this month.
-- Stolen anything: umm.. I steal too much stuff to ever remember where it goes and where it comes from... so prolly, yeah.

LAYER SEVEN:
Ever...
-- Played a game that required removal of clothing: Nope.
-- If so, was it mixed company: n/a
-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Yeah
-- Been caught "doing something": Nope
-- Been called a tease: Nope.
-- Gotten beaten up: I take my licks... but I never get beaten up.
-- Shoplifted: Yes
-- Changed who you were to fit in: Nope

LAYER EIGHT:
-- Age you hope to be married: I dunno... before 36 but after 20
-- Numbers and Names of Children: Umm... 3; John, Andrew & Mary... (I dunno..)
-- Describe your Dream Wedding: Something traditional but not really stiff and boring.. with my family there all teary-eyed and happy for me.
-- How do you want to die: Slowly; In a hospital or pinned under something heavy.. as long as I can talk to one or more of my immediate family members.
-- Where you want to go to college: I dont know.
-- What do you want to be when you grow up: A technition / jazz trumpeter
-- What country would you most like to visit: Britain(?)

LAYER NINE:
In a guy/girl..
-- Best eye color? Light green
-- Best hair color? Reddish brown.
-- Short or long hair: Long
-- height: Tall
-- Best weight: Medium
-- Best articles of clothing: Whatever's comfortable/makes her feel confident
-- Best first date location: Tokyo Lobby
-- Best first kiss location: At her front door(?)

LAYER TEN:
-- Number of drugs taken illegally: about.... 2
-- Number of people I could trust with my life: Maybe one or two..
-- Number of CDs that I own: Upwards of 200
-- Number of piercings: None
-- Number of tattoos: None
-- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: Never(?)
-- Number of scars on my body: Alot.. The biggest are, one on the left of my forehead, and one on my right shin/knee area.
-- Number of things in my past that I regret: Only a few things.

Thats alll folks.

Current Music : Cowboy Bebop - Goodnight Juilia

I'm going offline for a few days... I've been acused of alot of shit at my house that I didnt do.. and now I'm serving the time.

Stupidity is the best prosecutor.

Current Music : Die with you - Track 2

Videogamer rap.. haha

Videogame Skillz, Written by MoU$e (me! ^__^)

Its gametime, Everyone's ready,
Everyone's gunnin', but I'm nice and steady,
I'm the first out of the gate and I'm the main force..
And after five minutes I'm already on top of the scores.

I'm already in your base, and messin' your system like a bloodclot,
And dont even mess with me 'cause you'll die with my first shot,
Because I'm a 100% sure-shot; I hit your head every time, just like shazbot.

I sit at home on a friday night and kill ten people or none,
Like those commercials, 'whats your antidrug?'
For some kids, its a skill like painting or swimming and having fun,
But you know my antidrug is the only one that involves packin' a gun.

Just like myg0t, I've got a big mouth and the balls to back it,
Just like arnold, I've got a shotgun and the skills to pack it,
I've got the boomstick in one hand, and a piece of pizza in the other,
Why? because I'm a gamer.

And if you want to run, you can run,
But you're dead wrong, if you think you'll get away,
Because I'm the man with the machine gun,
And I can hit a flying fool any day,

Run little piggies, run.
You think you're faster,
But I could race right past'ya,
Then with my shotgun I'll blast'ya.

I play all night and I play all day just for kicks,
All of the admins think I cheat, they want me banned,
Its ok cause the [myg0t] kids taught me some tricks,
[ATAC] just banned me for killin a few teammates,

HLG has got me blacklisted for killing teammates; like I mentioned before.
But teammates dont mean a thing when you show up first,
Where they dead, already rollin' on those pearly gates in a hearst?
Where were they when you where knockin' on the door?

And on the rankings I'm number one,
I'm number one in the fields, and number one in the hills,
I'm number one with steals, and I'm number one with kills,
I'm number one, thats right, number one with the shotgun.

I've got the skills, come and you'll see..
I've got the hardware, running 90FPS constantly,
I've got the skills, leadin' my team to victory
I've got the software, and I never pay a dime for the latest thrash,

I'm better than you and your freind who just plays and does hash,
I'm better than fools who say 'get outta my house', when really they're just a guest.
I'm better than most who even call themselves the best,
I'm better than crazy hippies who only care about the game and the enviroment,
I'm the best, just wait until I come out of retirement.... :D

(Now you're supposed to laugh your ass off.)

Current Music : The Streets - Lets push things forward

Gotta knock a little harder
Words By: Tim Jensen
Vocals By: Mai Yamane
Album: Future Blues
--

Happiness is just a word to me
And it might have meant a thing or two
If I'd known the difference
Emptiness, a lonely parody
And my life, another smokin' gun
A sign of my indifference

Always keepin' safe inside
Where no one ever had a chance
To penetrate a break in

Let me tell you some have tried
But I would slam the door so tight
That they could never get in

Kept my cool under a lock and key
And I never shed a tear
Another sign of my condition

Fear of love or bitter vanity
That kept me on the run
The main events of my confession

I kept a chain upon my door
That would shake the shame of Cain
Into a blind submission

The burning ghost without a name
Was still calling all the same
But I just wouldn't listen

The longer I'd stall
The further I'd crawl
The further I'd crawl
The harder I'd fall
I was crawlin' into the fire

The more that I saw
The further I'd fall
The further I'd fall
The lower I'd crawl
I kept fallin' into the fire
Into the fire
Into the fire

Suddenly it occurred to me
The reason for the run and hide
Had totaled my existence

Everything left on the other side
Could never be much worse than this
But could I go the distance

I faced the door and all my shame
Tearin' off each piece of chain
Until they all were broken

But no matter how I tried
The other side was locked so tight
That door it wouldn't open

Gave it all that I got
And started to knock
Shouted for someone
To open the lock
I just gotta get through the door

And the more that I knocked
The hotter I got
The hotter I got!
The harder I'd knock!
I just gotta break through the door

Gotta knock a little harder
Gotta knock a little harder
Gotta knock a little harder!
Break through the door

Current Music : The Seatbelts - Gotta Knock a Little Harder

Here's a daydream I had.

Immersion.

You wake up, all is dark but you know you are concious... are you blind? its hard to tell. Your body feels as light as a feather.

You are laying on a ground-level bed above the covers. you stand up but are still blind; your eyes are tightly shut.

You hear music, at first far off but then creeping closer. Its a quiet melody even when close, and soon the source of the music is so close that you can feel the vibrations from the volume of it.

The tempo slows to a somber melody. And then even slower, almost to a ghastly march... and then so slow that it becomes a single beat; a drumming.

The song however comforting before in your blindness has now become an uncomfortable and oddly-paced thumping.

But then your eyes loosen, and you can see some hazy light peeking through your eyelids.

The drums drum on, even though you dont know where they are.

You find yourself in a small wooden building, in the center of a very large garden.

The light is very intense to your eyes, even though your eyes are adjusted from being previously sealed.

You think "This place may be heaven", you feel so peaceful.

You feel your hearbeat; and then it comes to you, the beating is coming from your heart.

Even before the music was only what you made it, at first a mellow sonate, then plunging into a grave march.

You wonder about this place; where is it? who lives here? how did you get here? many thoughts race through your head.

Soon the bright morning turns into a dark night. With the sun your eyes fade as well, And then you plunge into darkness again.

You wake up in your home.. because you where just daydreaming again.

Current Music : The Seatbelts - Encore En Verre

Up down turn around, please
dont let me hit the ground,
tonight I think I'll walk alone,
I'll find my soul as I go home,

"Strongbad-- Current status with the ladies: They all still want me"

ha- ha- ha.

Current Music : Yoko Kanno - Gotta knock a little harder

Sorry... to Rochelle, and anyone else I've snapped at in the past few days... I'm really under alot of stress.. and I'm sorry if I said some crap to you, theres no excuse for it.

Thats it. Goodnight everyone.

Current Music : The Seatbelts - Too Good, Too Bad.

12 PACK, READY? GO!



Greatness

So, you're most like my most prized possession...my anime collection.
You are constantly growing, much to your own dismay. You have
good taste, but every now and then something grows on you that
doesn't seem like it belongs. You are also worth somewhere near
a thousand bucks. Happy?
What Random Object From Ydoc Nameloc's Room Are You?





Who are you?
What character from a creepy anime are you?




What anime hue are you?




From "Final Fantasy 7"
What Video Game Villain Are You?







I'm just watching a bad dream I'd never wake up from.

You're the cool headed Spike. Not much gets to you...seemingly. you hold some inner pain, but you keep it hidden as best as you can. Inner pain or not, you are incredibly bad-ass

Find out what anime bad boy you are.





What Goth Are You?




Devestation



You're weapon is the extremely devestating Angel Arm.
It's been known to destroy entire cities and put a giant crater in the moon.
People must be frightened of you, or at least you'd like to think they are.

What's Your Anime Weapon?








Take the Anime Sountrack Quiz





Classic Anime Gag


Your anime power is the ability to give off one super strong punch when angry.
Infact the punch is so strong it sends the buffest of people flying miles into the air.
*cough* love hina *cough* Ranma 1/2 *cough*

What's Your Anime Power?


HAHAHAHA

Goofy, sweet, and a bit perverted. Usually your type tends to
put an outward appearance of being a nutcase when they actually
are quite serious and emotionally torn....and then some are just
nutcases.

Find out what anime character cliche you are.







Strong, Silent, Baddie-buster

You are the one thing a video game can't exist without. You are
the hero. You never are out for the count, and you just seem to
get stronger. The people look up to you, but be careful...your
sidekicks might start to think "mutiny".

Find out what anime character cliche you are.









Find out what anime series you belong in.


Current Music : Cowboy Bebop - On the run

W00T!

Blue-Bomber
What Video Game Hero Are You?

I remember when me and josh where sitting in his bedroom playing megaman when we were like 8...

Good times.

Current Music : Yoko Kanno - Mushroom Hunting

Whats all of this ruckatailia?





You're very random! sanity comes hard--
when you're not singing to complete strangers
or using made-up words in conversation,
you can be normal... but hey, why bother?

How random are you?

this quiz was made by alanna



Current Music : Yoko Kanno - The Real Folk Blues

Fun with mugi

So yeah, there I was under the huntington beach pier, playing "Who can touch the farthest piling without getting too wet?" with jody's freind mugi(MOO-GEE)....

I touched the 4th one from the waterline when the tide went out.... then it came back in and I was soaked.. So I walked around main street huntington beach with barbara, jody and their college buds..

Anndd... today I woke up... nearly every joint in my body was sore.. and a few dozen muscles to boot... egh... it was 10:05AM when I woke up.. and church starts at 10:30AM sharp... so I threw on some clothes real quick'a-like... and boom.. there I was at church around 10:20.. totally crapfaced....

Eww... I'm soo tired and I get to pour concrete with my dad in the california sun.

"Pray for mojo"

Current Music : Yoko Kanno and The Seatbelts - Pushing the sky